I wish I was gayer

I don't think I fit in very well into the gay community. Last night I was out with a bunch of people and my friend Chris met up with us and left after like 20 minutes. He went off to a gay sports bar (oxymoron?) and when I texted him being like "dude why did you just up and leave?" he texted back "I just don't like straight bars." I really don't get that. I mean I can understand having a preference of one over the other...but to actually be averse to going to a straight bar? The fact that I don't understand this makes me scared because it makes me suspect that I just don't understand basic ideologies that the entire gay community takes as unalienable truths. Am I missing some sort of gene? I feel like I missed out on the Kool-aid drinking session and I feel like I will never really be able to connect with gay men. I see people's facebook albums at new york, baltimore, and DC pride and I scoff at the fact that someone would go from city to city participating in gay pride weeks. Or like why would you go to a party called "madonnarama"? So I guess my fear is that I will never be gay enough, never really get it enough to really be a part of the gay community, and will be cursed to an existence dictated by visits to straight bars sipping beers and being everyone's token "gay best friend." What a lonely life...I went home last night without telling anyone cause I was upset and fell off my bike just as I was pulling up to the front door. The thing I find most funny is that my first thought was "god I hope I didn't rip these pants."